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*Bucuros ca un copil că afară ninge și asta înseamnă că sigur o să-i aducă Moș Varan un pușcoci de jucărie, să se laude cu el la televizor, Mircea Badea a comentat la Antena 3 zvonurile legate de pregătirea unui nou protest masiv, pe 1 Decembrie. „Am toată încrederea că protestul ăsta de pe 1 Decembrie va fi unul pașnic. Și chiar cred asta. Una e să îți dea cu tunul de apă în august, e alta să îți dea în decembrie. Fac un apel către domnul Dragnea, care a fost ocupat să reprime protestele din Franța, faceți o excepție și nu mai conduceți mașina cu tunul de apă”, a spus Badea, abia abținându-se să nu pufnească în râs, la glumița debitată. Vai, Mircică, inteligentule, ce-ți plac glumele tale. Carevasăzică tot Dragnea a reprimat protestele din Franța? Ha-ha, ce ne-am mai râs! Și tot el o să conducă mașina cu tunul de apă, dacă scapă lucrurile de sub control pe 1 Decembrie? Prietene, stai calm și nu te mai agita: știu din surse sigure că Dragnea n-o să conducă nicio mașină cu tun de apă de Ziua Națională. N-are cum, chiar dacă ar vrea. Și știi de ce? Pentru că în ziua aia a fost  deja antamat să conducă vidanja spre Antena 3 – doar voi, anteniștii, sunteți mândri că sunteți români și trebuie să mănâncă și gura voastră câte ceva, nu?

*În mod normal, o agenție de presă află prima, înaintea altor surse, informațiile și le livrează ziarelor, televiziunilor și radiourilor. Dar uite că Mediafax, preocupată să difuzeze interviuri omagiale cu Cristoiu și Adrian Sârbu, s-a lu  aseară: „Furtul secolului: Povestea tablourilor arse şi cum a apărut un Picasso la Tulcea după 6 ani”. Alo, nea Adriane, mai dă-le, tati, și medafacșilor o primă de Crăciun, acolo, poate or fi și ei mai atenți și mai rapizi. Că la halul în care se mișcă ditamai agenția, ajunge Cristoiu să îl trădeze pe stăpânul Dragnea și ei tot erou al luptei „anti-haștagiste, anti-soroșiste și anti-tefeliste” îl dau pe maistru!

*Dacă n-ați mai auzit de mult o glumă bună și vreți să râdeți, intrați pe site-ul lui Iosif Bubble, stiripesurse.ro, și citiți despre cel mai nou sondaj efectuat de CURS, institutul unde Ioșca e un fel de bulibașă local. Articolul se intitulează, sugestiv, „SONDAJ CURS – Probleme mari pentru președintele Klaus Iohannis în București. Tăriceanu defilează sub asaltul procurilor DNA”. Ce aflăm din el? Că dacă duminică ar avea loc alegeri prezidențiale, cel puțin în București Klaus Iohannis ar fi zdrobit încă din turul I, obținând doar 21 % din voturi, în timp ce Tăriceanu ar „defila”, cu 31% la sută, iar Dragnea ar lua și el 17%. Bubble, nu încetezi să mă uimești, garsoane, cu predicțiile tale! Eu cred că, de fapt, tu nici nu ești ziarist, mă, tu ești profet sub acoperire, rodul iubirii cu năbădăi dintre Baba Vanga și Nostradamus. Chiar nu-nțeleg de ce nu-ți schimbi numele, de pildă în Marcăbanus, să priceapă și clienții tăi politici mai bine cum merge treaba și să marce banul mai rapid. Poate că Iohannis n-o să mai ia atât de multe voturi la București, că vorba aia, gecile roșii care nu se văd în stradă, se uită, dar de unde ai scos, gigele, că ia Tăriceanu 31% din voturi? Poate dacă se prezintă la vot doar cele cinci neveste ale lui, plus nevastă-ta penelisto-pesedisto-fripturistă Diana Tușa, tu și alți câțiva gudurei de la site-ul vostru. Nu mai vorbesc de Dragnea – ăla nu ia 17% nici dacă dă all-inclusive la Belina la tot poporul! Dar, judecând după faptul că sondorii lui pește au dat la referendum o prezență de 34% și în realitate prezența n-a trecut de 21%, înseamnă că și Dragnea tot cu 13% mai puțin ar lua, adică 4% dintre votanți – el, piți, Dragnea Jr, piți lui Dragnea Jr și majordomul. Restul, până la 21% probabil e comisionul lui Bubble.

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